blah blah blah. this week was ok. not much to talk about but the beach. we are stupid. megan, bryan, and i sat three to a seat even though there were ten empty seats around us. it was pretty fun though. megan ate all of bryan's food. we played the abc game. i was behind by so much! oh well. but i still got second place. stupid bryan! we got to the beach. megan got thrown in during the first ten minutes. we just sat around and talked. that was kind of fun. then lunch came and everyone went to their potlucks. i was not asked so i just sat there. chris was with everyone so i did not want to go there. it would have been really weird. i guess i do not like being with my friends if he is there. it just gets me depressed. everyone looked like they were having fun so i went to jenelyn. she gave me food! =) but she also gave me this nasty chocolate thing. it was so gross! then i met up with bryan and megan again. we sat three to a seat on the way back home too. we fell asleep. some people played this slapping game. you could hear some veins pop. over all the beach was ok.

yesterday we had a vespers. (jed was really happy.) the speaker was talking about how he met his wife. it was so sweet! but then i just thought about me and chris and i just got depressed. but the message that he told us was really good.

i was listening to my northern mix cd. there are so many songs that i can relate to! there is one song in particular, "you and i both" by jason mraz. i love that song! i really like the part where it says "and it's okay if you have to go away. just remember the telephone works both ways. and if I never ever hear it ring if nothing else I'll think the bells inside have finally found you someone else and that's okay cause I'll remember everything you sang." i am so sad! then i started thinking about memories of chris and i. i was thinking about last february when he had a surprise party for me. it was so sweet! then i started thinking about all the other memories. and that reminded me of "one year, six months" by yellowcard. "All that I've got to pull me through is memories of you." grr! he seems so unphased. but i guess that i should not be surprised. he is fine. and he will be totally over me by the time summer vacation is over. i hate this...