some people do not see what is in front of them. instead they want something that they cannot have. there are so many other people that want them and can treat them so much better. but they are so blinded by this other person that they cannot even see these amazing people that would give them everything and not treat them like shit! change subject... today was so awkward. i went into ms. iversen’s room and there were only four of us in there. it felt so weird. even with more people it felt weird. and then i saw them together and they walked by me and i felt so awkward. i was so excited for the cruise. and then today we had a class meeting where they passed out the list of who was in who’s group. that is when i started to dread going to cruise. i do not want to see that. but today made me realize that even if it is awkward for me and i am still getting hurt a little, i still love and care about him. and i want him to be happy, even if that means me having to go through all of that. but still, it pains me so much to see, hear, and read certain things. and every time that happens it is like a sharp stab to my heart.

i know i did the right thing.